As I’m nearing what I consider the 7th inning stretch of my teaching career, I’ve been thinking about all the young teachers that are just coming up to bat for the first time this school year. I decided to write an open letter directly to this hard working group of energetic and optimistic young educators. Here it is:
Dear Miss or Mr. (insert your name),
I know that it still gives you a thrill to have someone address you this way after working so hard for 4 years on getting prepared to become THE teacher in your own classroom (one day in the future, you will cringe when you hear your surname in the grocery store). Congratulations! I can remember how happy I was when I was hired for my first teaching position at a Catholic school. I was teaching all day kindergarten with 25 kids, 2 of whom spoke no English, and another 4 with what is clear to me now was undiagnosed ADHD. I received $10,000 for the privilege which increased to a whopping $10,800 year two. I was mandated to teach religion but could alternate teaching math and reading each day. I set up cots every day for rest time and brought 25 5 year olds to First Friday mass each month hoping that everyone used the restroom beforehand. Good times…
Whether you are working at a private or public school, there are some things that I think weren’t covered in your college courses. As much as student teaching felt like actual teaching, it was still guided by (hopefully) an experienced and caring fellow teacher. When you are on your own, it is much different as I’m sure you have discovered. If you tried to start off as the “friend” to your students, I’m so sorry for the havoc that has produced because of that misguided decision. Remember, they have plenty of friends. They need a teacher who can set boundaries while still showing they care. If you can’t make that work this late into the school year, maybe try bribery….the promise of a Skittle or an M&M can go a long way (Think about good ole Pavlov who I’m sure you had to read about in Childhood Psychology).
What I have done is to compose a multimedia list of items to help make your journey into your career a smoother one. I was going to make this just a reading list but let’s be honest: you won’t have much time to read until summertime. I also realize that many of you are of the generation that don’t pick up books as much as you download them. No worries. The titles I’m suggesting are easy to find on amazon.com or as I like to call it “The Place Where Most of My Paycheck Goes to Live”. Nothing like finding coin manipulatives, 100 day crowns, and bulk containers of Advil all in one place! (Splurge for the Prime Membership because days like Dr. Seuss’ Birthday and Earth Day will sneak up on you. You’ll be glad to be able to get items in 2 days).
So without further ado, here are my recommendations for helping you develop into a well-rounded and fairly sane teacher. This list is in no order of importance, but it does require that you have a sense of humor and a sense of adventure for the wild ride ahead of you.
- Read Alice in Wonderland or alternatively watch the Johnny Depp version (Yes, he is creepy in this role, but I promise he will prepare you for at least one parent conference in your future). If you have no idea what happened in this story, watch the music video “Don’t Come Around Here No More” (RIP, Tom Petty…I can’t believe Keith Richards and Willie Nelson both outlived you). There is a section in this book where Alice finds a piece of cake that says “Eat me” and a bottle of something (pretty sure it was liquid morphine because Lewis Carroll had to be one freaky character to dream up that whole Tea Party scene) that says “Drink me”. When Alice follows these directions, the results are completely different from what she needs. What Alice doesn’t realize is that these signs are both extremes and that neither of them is the end all and be all. Takeaway #1: When it comes to teaching a group of kids, no one method is going to work for all your kids. Be prepared to develop a toolkit of strategies to help you reach the diverse population you will likely have in your room. Don’t believe anyone who tells you THIS is the way to teach (insert reading, math, science…). The more tools you have in your toolbox, the better you’ll be able to reach every one of your students. And speaking of the kiddos….
- Read The Hunger Games or even better, watch the first movie in the series. First of all, Lenny Kravitz is smoking hot in the film even though his character definitely was in touch with the feminine part of his soul. But the real reason I want you to watch it is that it shows two realities of teaching. First of all, the turbulent scenes of the Tributes going after the food when first dropped into the jungle is an exact replica of what it can be like in the cafeteria on pizza day. No matter what school you work in, you can rest assured that you will have a pizza day and it’s usually a Friday. Listen closely: stay away from the cafeteria. Most days the chaos and noise produced in these rooms (which usually have the most God awful echo) is enough to drive anyone insane (Be extra nice to lunch monitors…they’re not Tributes but they’re also working for less than peanuts. 3 finger salute to them all). More importantly, the Hunger Games shows kids at their worst. But remember, THERE WAS A REASON FOR THEIR VIOLENT BEHAVIOR. Their names were chosen randomly just as your students were born randomly to their families. A Tribute had no control over his destiny (except for Katniss, heroine for this generation of kids). Takeaway #2 Bad behavior from a child always has a reason behind it. Katniss and Peeta were normally laid back kids who spent their free time hunting for food for the family and working at the family bakery (Something I eerily have in common with Peeta…have to admit I was rooting for him to win). Being chosen as Tributes changed them into killers. When you have a student who is constantly misbehaving, look for the cause. Swallow your pride and see if it has something to do with the lesson you are teaching. Are you requiring the kids to stay still for too long? Is the content so far over this child’s head that he has given up trying to pay attention? Talk to him and see what is going on at home. Some of the home lives of my students have reduced me to tears. I am amazed that they have the courage to show up every day. Misbehavior always has a root cause. And it’s your job to find out what that is and do your best to help him even if it means reporting abuse. You are their Sponsor sending down parachutes of tools that they need to survive. You are sometimes their main lifeline. Speaking of parts of your job you didn’t realize were there…
- Buy one Transformer toy at any place toys are sold. OK, I know this sounds juvenile, but hang with me here. Transformers were big in the 1980s when most of you weren’t even a glimmer in your father’s eyes (yes, that was said with contempt). But I was in high school and college, working with kids in daycare centers and summer camps. These toys were everywhere! And they were just amazing to me. One minute a 4 year old would be showing me a car toy and the next minute it would suddenly morph into a big robot! I was never good with my hands so it amused the kids that I had to ask them how to transform the toy back. This is a lot how teaching can be. Takeaway #3: Be prepared to switch your role from teacher to counselor to nurse to mom to secretary to protector to advocate to referee and finally back to teacher again…many, many times within the span of a typical school day. You will have so many tasks to do during a single hour that will require different roles to come out. Bandaids are must haves in any primary classroom, and I have had to provide emergency female health related resources when teaching sixth grade. You will help your kids settle arguments although your final goal should always be to model for them how to solve those problem themselves. And I don’t want to go into how in the 21st century you may have to one day protect your students from an intruder (phrases like active shooter and thoughts about how to keep my frightened 7 year olds silent are realities I wish I could joke away). So onto the role of secretary…
- Get a handheld version of Pac Man or Lady Pac Man. Again, this may seem like a frivolous use of your paycheck, but I will explain. In this classic video game, the pacman is constantly running away from these ghosts that seem to be around every corner. Go ahead and practice getting away from the ghosts and gobbling up the “power cookies” that are spread out around the path. Build up your confidence and rejoice in those times when you do get rid of all of the ghosts. This will be the last time you feel victorious. For you see, those ghosts are real and are made of charts, checklists, and other paper products. Takeaway #4:You will have a countless number of paperwork over the course of your career. From IEP forms to behavior checklists, you will be asked to fill out a variety of forms for countless number of people. You often will fill out the SAME EXACT INFORMATION multiple times over the course of a semester. Supply orders, notes home, behavior checklists, reward systems, report card comments, surveys, endless email, and so many more piles of dead trees will come across your desk. Invest in lots of folders to keep all of this paper work straight and practice your slapped on smile for the idiots…err…I mean colleagues who will ask you to fill out these forms which “shouldn’t take more than a few minutes” (translation: goodbye prep period). The next two suggestions will help you bond with both supervisors and colleagues.
- Read or watch Carrie by Stephen King . I’ve only been able to watch the movie once but certain scenes have eerily played out in my teaching career. The scene where Carrie gets covered with blood is iconic, but my focus isn’t on the goriness of the blood (pretty tame to what kids see in video games these days). I want you to focus on the part where Carrie is wild-eyed and shooting destructive looks all around the gymnasium (yes, proms used to be held in gymnasiums not wedding halls or places too expensive for any teacher to stay for even one night). Not to frighten you, but this look will most likely be given by one supervisor or another during the span of your career. Takeaway #5: Some crazy people get involved in education. I had a principal who not only had this unpredictable and unstable nature, but she actually resembled Carrie’s portrayer in the movie, Sissy Spacek. Although Carrie had reason to be angry, I think we can all agree that she took things a tad too far. There will be people you work for and with who are emotionally unstable. Now, I’m not talking about the occasional emotional breakdown that EVERYONE has during a stressful school year (yes, this will include you). I’m talking about a person who consistently finds ways to put you down and to find fault in everything you do. The reason they are highly critical is usually because they KNOW they could never do what we do, day in and day out. It also could be just like the kids who act out: they could just be dealing with problems at home. Not all people leave home problems at home. This, unfortunately, may include your teaching colleagues. I have had grade level colleagues who would get angry if I didn’t do the same activities that they did. Or others who stopped talking to me because I read the same book to my class as they did. In other districts, I have worked with people who clearly did not like children. What they DO like is having control over a group of children. Control freaks aside, the best advice I can give you for dealing with these people is keeping your classroom door closed. If that person is your supervisor, try to gauge his/her mood and avoid them whenever it looks like Carrie might make an appearance. On a more positive note, the next takeaway will help you with those great colleagues and supervisors you will have.
- Read or watch Eat, Pray. Love. I haven’t seen the movie version because Julia Roberts is in it. I just can’t get past the fact that she was born only 5 days after me yet looks about 15 years younger. Bitch. Anyway, my advice is connected directly to what I hope are the majority of your colleagues and supervisors. Takeaway # 6 Eat with, pray (for) and love your colleagues. Now, I have to admit that I don’t follow the first part of this trilogy very well at all. Eat in the faculty room when you can. This will help you learn about your colleagues and bond over your similarities. It also will give you time to decompress from the stresses of the classroom. Sometimes faculty rooms can be negative places so this advice won’t always work. But do always keep a stash of candy in your desk. Then you can bond with anyone you want or be a hero at the next meeting. Bonding with your colleagues will include hearing about how their problems may be 10 times worse than yours. If you pray, keep them in your prayers…especially if they teach the grade before you because you want them to be strong teachers. Otherwise, you are going to end up with undereducated students and nobody has time for that. If you don’t pray, just remember to smile at them or hug them (not my style…unless Lenny Kravitz comes to teach with Ms. Lo). And when a colleague is going through a hard time in their personal life, really send out the love vibes to them (1960s child coming through). If you can do something like donate sick days to a colleague caring for a parent in hospice or make a meal for someone who has had a death in the family, do it. Teaching is hard enough without us not being there for each other.
- Watch reruns of Married with Children and Modern Family. First, watch the Married with Children reruns. You will see the worst of the worst as far as parenting goes. You will see parents who don’t spend any quality time with their kids. You will see a daughter who flaunts her body because she thinks that is her only asset (played by the awesome teenaged Christine Applegate, one of the bravest and most versatile actresses I’ve seen). You will see a son who is constantly put down and made to feel like he is worthless. You will see parents who constantly insult each other in front of their kids. Go ahead, laugh and enjoy the bawdy humor. And then know that there will be kids in your class that face this and much worse on a daily basis. But make sure you then watch some Modern Family episodes. You will see a quirky, funny, and REAL family. There are arguments but peaceful resolutions in the end. There are the branches of the family that are “traditional” like Clair and Phil (with Phil always trying to be too cool for his own good). Then there is the blended family of Jay and Gloria (and don’t forget my favorite Frenchie, Stella). And my favorite by far, the adorable family of Mitch and Cam. Takeaway #7: Know that no two families are the same. Take the time to get to know your families. Write newsletters to get them involved. Use texts and other forms of technology to stay in touch. Invite them into the classroom. Your families may seem “scary” to you but once you get to know them and they get to know you, most will be your biggest supporters.
That’s about it for now friends. Hang in there, because February break is coming up. Be sure to rest up because March is a looonnnnggg month. From one teacher to another, you can do it.
Sincerely,
Ms. Lo
One Foot In, One Foot Back 